Hannah

Hannah's Story

Hannah Elizabeth Pint was born to us on February 14, 2001. Hannah was very special from the moment she was conceived. We knew she was on her way eleven days after God gave her to us, and we have never been more excited. Her pregnancy should have been old-hat...after all this was our third baby, right? The pregnancy was not terribly difficult. But, as time passed, it was very different than my previous pregnancies. I began to have contractions and sharp pains. I complained to the doctor at 18 weeks that something "wasn't right". The family practice physician sent me to an OB. It is standard practice at this base to not see an OB unless you are termed "high risk". The OB was less than concerned. She told me what I was experiencing was normal for a woman who has been pregnant before. Still... doubts nagged at me. I returned to this OB 2 weeks later insisting things were not right. She disagreed. Later, the same day of the appointment, I called her. When I didn't hear the answer I wanted, I called again about an hour later. Finally, she agreed to do an ultrasound. When they did the ultrasound they found a problem. Not with little Hannah! She was PERFECT. Her little heart beat just right and we could see her wiggle on the screen. The problem was me. A cervix has an inner and outer os. Normally a woman opens outside to the inner. However mine was opening from the inside out and the cervical length was MUCH MUCH shorter than it should have been. The length of the cervix can help determine pre-term delivery in abnormal situations. She was very concerned. One week later I returned to see a visiting OB who specialized in high risk pregnancies. I will admit I had been a little worried about baby Hannah but not terribly concerned. After all, Mark and I had weathered two healthy pregnancies! Nobody has problems with their third baby!

At this appointment things were going seemingly well. I had not found it necessary to have Mark take time off work... fairly routine I had thought. The doctor pointed to me all the baby's parts and measured her to make sure we were working with accurate dates. I was feeling reassured until I heard her say something that included the words... "if you make it to March." If I make it to March!?!?!?! What in the world was that? March 1st I would have only been 28 weeks pregnant... an entire 12 weeks early. I asked the doctor if she thought we would make it to March and she said No. It hit me at that moment that we were dealing with something serious. We called Mark's mom that night and made arrangements for her to come all the way from Iowa to take care of the kids for three weeks. I was put on very strict bedrest ... only to move for potty breaks.

On February 4th, I went to a doctor's appointment. I had relaxed some. I was on very strict bedrest, but the condition (whatever it was), was not worsening. The doctor set up the ultrasound and took one or two measurements of my interior os and sent me to Labor and Delivery. There had been significant changes to my cervix and they feared I might be in labor... at 24 weeks. I was put on Magnesium Sulfate... horrible, terrible stuff. We were emergency transported to Loma Linda Hospital. I didn't get to say good-bye to the kids.

At Loma Linda, I had a severe reaction to the Mag. An EKG later, we found that I had not experienced a heart attack and was just having severe pain...not much of a relief to me at the time. HOWEVER, no matter how horrible Mag is, it did stop my labor. I was off and on Magnesium for ten days. By the ninth day they had stopped labor twice. On the tenth day it was determined that I had dilated to 6.5cm... the baby only needed 6cm to be delivered because she was so incredibly tiny. On that tenth day in the hospital I turned 26 weeks pregnant. Hannah could no longer stay in Mommy... we were having issues with a slight placental abruption that just wouldn't seem to stop bleeding. It was truly frightening to deliver her.

We went into the OR in case of emergency c-section. They had turned off the Mag and on the pitocin. I had been having contractions all morning and they didn't need to be strong to deliver our tiny Hannah.

Hannah's name has very special meaning. Hannah, in the Bible, prayed and prayed for a child. God heard her prayer and gave her Samuel. Hannah was a woman of God. She returned her son that she so cherished to the Lord. Hannah means "full of grace". Hannah's middle name is Elizabeth. Elizabeth means consecrated / promised to the Lord.

By the Grace of God Hannah was born and we got to hear her cry! She sounded like a tiny kitten...just plaintive little meows. I can remember them holding her up for just a moment and then passing her through the window to the neonatal team. Mark went to see her, and she was actually breathing on her own though they did have to intubate because she just wouldn't have been able to keep that up despite her strong little spirit. At 1lb 15 oz, she was tiny. Her body not as big as my hand, and her thigh smaller than an adult thumb. She was incredibly beautiful. She had a lot of dark hair and a tiny perfect mouth. She had teeny, tiny features although her hands looked huge and her feet were so long!

I got out of the hospital the next morning, but Hannah had a long road ahead of her. We could touch her in her tiny incubator. We were taught how to touch her so to keep her heart and breathing levels normal. I even got to change her diaper once. The diapers are unbelievable... you cannot imagine the size unless you've seen them. Hannah was beautiful and perfect. Every part was just as it should have been... but tiny.

That second day was hard. We were told she had a hole in her heart, severe brain bleeding, a valve in her heart was open, her lungs were not at all mature, and she was very vulnerable. We prayed. I prayed a lot.... a lot. We had her baptised.

The next day was better. Hannah did not have a hole in her heart. Hurrah!

The next day even better. Hannah had not had severe bleeding. One side of her brain had a Level I bleed (very minor) and the other a Level II bleed. (Level IV is the worst).

Each day was better than the last. We kept expecting bad news. They told us to expect mishaps...problems. Yet each day was good. Mark's mom had to go home and we began making arrangements for the children. After all, Hannah had made it through that first hard week and was only getting better.

The nurse was ready to begin Hannah on Mommy Milk. There is NOTHING like mama's milk for preemies. They need it. It differs than normal breastmilk. Mom's body knows what to make just for a preemie. Her nurse even told us that we would probably begin holding her early the next week and we had to watch a "kangaroo" video at her bedside to learn how and why we need to hold her next to our skin.

We went home for the weekend. I had been away from the kids for a few weeks and needed to spend time with them. We spent all day Sunday at home despite our plans to go see Hannah. We called in the morning and all was well. I called again in the evening and they said that Hannah had some green coming from her intestines but that they were watching it very closely and were not overly concerned. We would see her in the morning!

The next morning, Monday, February 26th, we awoke to go see our little girl. I was in the bathtub when the phone rang. I heard Mark and knew it was the hospital. I knew it wasn't good... just listening to his side of the conversation. We had some decisions to make today. Hannah had had a very "bad" night. Our little girl wasn't going to make it. We had to go to Loma Linda right away.

She was awake when we got there. It was the first time I had ever seen her eyes. They were oh so blue...like Christian's. She was so tiny. She looked more alive that morning than any other day we had ever seen her. We thought certainly there must be some mistake... I mean, here she was LOOKING at us. She wasn't dying.

There was no mistake. Hannah had severe brain bleeds on both sides. Her lungs were completely failing. But, by far, the most crippling blow was the necrotizing enterocolitis. Hannah had an infection in her abdomen and it was far too severe to fix. Her doctor, who had had the weekend off, was shocked to find her in the condition she was in. We went into a room and began to talk............

I had prayed so hard.

And, one of the things I had so desperately prayed for was this:

If Hannah was not meant to be long in this world, that we would not have to shut off machines or end our daughter's life.

God is a loving God. He hears prayers. He answers prayers. His way is not always our way but it is always better. He loved our daughter more than even we did. And God answered my prayers. In the midst of that meeting, a nurse came in. They could no longer support Hannah through any artificial means. If we wanted to hold our baby for the first and last time it had to be now.

We held our baby girl. She was perfect in every way that we could have ever hoped. She was loved more in her short life than most people are loved in an entire lifetime. I hope she didn't feel the pain. Letting go of her was the hardest thing we have ever done. We were very blessed that God allowed us to have her for any time. I'll admit that I wish we could have had her for so much longer.

I'll not be sorry that Hannah lived. I'll not be sorry that we had her for twelve very precious days. We have a daughter that was not ours to hold. She goes before us, but we will see her again.

Hannah Elizabeth Pint was born February 14th on Valentine's Day and went to be bounced on Christ's knee February 26th. She will be forever remembered, forever loved, and forever cherished. Her mother will not forget her. Her father will not forget her. Her brother and sisters will always hear her name and she will not be forgotten. She will be forever our baby and forever loved.